Age and Forms of Address in Korea

Why people ask your age

In Korea, it is common for someone you have just met to ask how old you are. Because Korean changes its speech style and forms of address depending on the relationship, people need to know your age to decide how to talk to you. When asking directly feels awkward, they may ask what year you were born, what your zodiac animal is or what year you entered university instead. If you get the question, take it as part of a greeting meant to sort out the relationship rather than an invasion of privacy. Of course, if you would rather not answer, laughing it off is fine.

International age, year age and counting age

Korea had three ways of counting age. International age starts at zero at birth and goes up by one on each birthday. Counting age makes you one at birth, and everyone adds a year together on January 1. Year age is simply the current year minus your birth year. Since June 28, 2023, laws and administration have been unified on international age, but some laws, such as those on youth protection and military service, still use year age. In everyday conversation, some people still give their counting age.

• Example: born December 31, 2000, as of October 2026
• International age 25: the birthday has not passed yet
• Year age 26: 2026 minus 2000
• Counting age 27: year age plus one

Born the same year, treated as friends

People born in the same year are called donggap, and they usually act as friends even if their birthdays are months apart. That is why Koreans tend to sort seniority by birth year rather than by birthday. In the past, children born in January and February could start school a year early, and people in that group were said to have an early birthday, which made it unclear which class they should be friends with. Drama scenes where characters bicker over age often have this background.

Honorific and casual speech

Jondaenmal is the honorific style that raises the listener, and banmal is the casual style used between close people. With strangers, shop staff and anyone whose age you do not know, honorific speech is the default. Switching to casual speech is usually suggested by the older person, who asks something like "shall we speak comfortably?", and the switch happens once the other person agrees. Even people of similar age often keep honorifics at work. For foreigners, learning the soft polite style that ends sentences in -yo covers most situations.

Unni, oppa, nuna and hyeong

The word for an older person depends on the speaker's gender. It is common to use these words for older people you have become close to, even outside the family, and they can also follow a name. Because many women call an older boyfriend oppa, the word can carry a subtle emotional nuance along with friendliness.

• A woman to an older woman: unni
• A woman to an older man: oppa
• A man to an older woman: nuna
• A man to an older man: hyeong

Ssi, nim and job titles after names

Ssi after a name is used for people of similar age or younger, so attaching it to a senior's name can be rude. Using only the surname with ssi, as in Kim-ssi, can also sound condescending. Nim is more polite and goes after the name of customers or people you are contacting for the first time. At work, people are usually addressed by their title plus nim, such as team leader-nim, instead of by name. At school or in clubs, those who joined earlier are sunbae and those who joined later are hubae.

Words used in shops and on the street

To call a server in a restaurant, say jeogiyo or yeogiyo, roughly "excuse me." Shop owners or managers are often called sajangnim, and at casual eateries some customers call a middle-aged woman on staff imo, which literally means aunt. Customers, in turn, are called sonnim or gogaengnim. Seonsaengnim is a respectful word used not only for teachers but also for doctors, professionals and sometimes adults whose age you do not know. These words show how Korean borrows family terms to close the distance between people.

What foreigners should remember

Few people will make an issue of a foreigner getting a form of address slightly wrong. Standards vary by generation and workplace culture, so when in doubt, the surest approach is to ask what you should call someone.

• Start with honorific speech; switch to casual only when invited
• Do not put a senior's name together with ssi
• At work, add nim to the job title
• If unsure, ask how they would like to be addressed